“Why are you crying?” I asked my daughter.
“I can’t do it,” she answered.
“Yes, you can,” I said firmly. “The only limitation is the one, you have set in your mind.”
The above exchange between my daughter and I illustrate the complexities one must overcome when trying to push their offspring, while at the same differentiating the role of a father and a coach.
This difficulty is not limited only to my daughter, but also with my wife, albeit not from the inability to perform the various exercises. My wife’s dilemma is that although she has followed my instructions to the letter, the results up to now have not been the same.
There comes a turning point, when explanations cease to spur the individual to action, but an innocuous event does. For those who haven’t, I suggest reading the first two installments of this story. For the rest, I will add a few repetitive lines, so I can continue with my tale.
My wife looked at me suspiciously. I knew that look all too well. She was pondering the intricacies of my plan to get a leaner physique, if she wanted to do it, and more importantly would it all be worth it.
You would have thought my exhaustive explanation convinced her, but no, it was actually what she saw on my phone. FaceTime has become the premier tool for communicating with our eldest daughter, during the pandemic’s self-quarantine, and on this particular occasion, I was conversing with her from my phone.
I passed the phone to my wife to finish the conversation. I went to another room to finish an article I had been working on, and a short time later . . .
“You weigh … pounds,” she bellowed. “Why didn’t you tell me? I can’t believe you weigh! You never said a word!”
I was flabbergasted and speechless. Never in my fitness journey, did I mention my weight or body fat percentage. What purpose would it have served? Braggadocio does not inspire, but alienates, and increases the doubt an individual has when they compare himself or herself with the accomplishment of another.
My teenager, who never hears when she is being called, of course her heard mother’s astonished declaration, and chimed in, “You weigh how much?”
What had happened was simple. We own a Withings Body+ scale, and through their app, when one steps on the scale, weight, body fat%, etc., are calculated and compiled on a daily dashboard. The numbers my wife had been privy to see, and vociferously made known to the entire household did what my exhaustive explanation could not.
The night, my daughter vowed that she would duplicate my efforts, ride the Peloton Bike, and exercise her abs daily, for the next thirty days.
My wife has not spoken of my weight loss again, but is on her own quest to duplicate my efforts as well.
I refrain from further explanations. Hopefully, they now understand that building muscles, while losing weight is not linear. The human body is complex, and there will be periods of weight, and body fat percentage fluctuations, but if both keep a positive attitude and press onward through those permutations, my wife and daughter will be pleasantly surprised with their fitness transformations.